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What to Give Up to Attract Love

Many times when people want to attract their ideal partner,
they make a list of things to do -- action steps, if you will --
that will help them meet "the one." They add new activities into
their routine, join dating services, and write singles ads. They
may start an exercise program or buy new clothes in an effort to
look better. They let their friends know they're "in the market."

Seldom do people think of giving up something as a way to
attract Mr. or Ms. Right. Well, this is not entirely true.
People may give up such things as smoking or overeating. But the
kind of "giving-up" I'm referring to is about your beliefs,
attitudes, and feelings. Giving up something in one of these
areas is more likely to lead you to your Mr. or Ms. Right.

Below is a list of things you should consider giving up if you
want to attract your Mr. or Ms. Right.

1. Give up anger at the opposite sex.
You can tell when people have a chip on their shoulders. And
yet those who are angry and disappointed with the opposite sex
think their feelings are undetectable. If you can truly give up
the anger at the opposite sex, you have a much better chance of
attracting the partner you want.

2. Give up on your past relationships.
Most of us can tell when someone is unavailable or ambivalent
about dating because of an unfinished relationship. If you hope
that one of your past partners will come back, others will be
able to tell. Your ideal partner will surely want a completely
available partner. You'll be hard pressed to attract him or her
until you are completely available.

3. Give up trying to be perfect in order to attract a mate.
As long as you think your body, your pocketbook, or your
emotional well-being have to be in perfect shape in order to be
loved, you will remain alone. A state of perfection can seldom
be achieved -- we are inherently imperfect. You are peachy just
as you are for some lucky person out there.

4. Give up protecting yourself from hurt.
Lots of singles devise all sorts of tests to make sure
potential partners won't hurt them the way they were hurt in the
past. This never works because people know when they are being
tested and will either fake it or fail on purpose. Instead,
become the type of person who is seldom mistreated and who can
set strong, clear boundaries.

5. Give up looking for a relationship.
Looking for a relationship is like looking for a needle in a
haystack. Although singles ads and dating services bring some
success and are good for getting lots of dating experience, most
people still meet their life partner by chance. Your best bet
for finding your Mr. or Ms. Right is to have a wonderful life

6. Give up on conversations about the lack of available
Singles frequently complain: "There are no good single men or
women left." "There are no good single men or women where I
live." You will see what you believe you will see. The issue is
not about what types of singles are in your community or whether
there are any good men or women left. It is not about men and
women out there at all, because you don't need many men or women
to be a particular way. What you want and need is one compatible
partner. And this one partner is waiting for you to change your
belief about what you will see and make him or her visible to

Want to know how to take effective actions on these six items
you need to give up? The action steps and the other 11 lessons
are all detailed in the new class, "How to Stop Being Single."
For more info and to register go to

Your Relationship Coach,
Rinatta Paries

(c) Rinatta Paries. Do you know how to attract your ideal mate? Do you know how to build a fulfilling relationship, or how to reinvent yours to meet your needs? Relationship Coach Rinatta Paries can teach you the skills and techniques to attract and sustain long-term, healthy partnerships. Visit where you'll find quizzes, classes, advice and a free weekly ezine. Become a "true love magnet(tm)!"

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